Rimming 101: A Complete Guide to Rimming

Dr. Evan Goldstein

fundamentals July 13, 2020

What is Rimming?

Rimming, also known as analingus, is when the giving partner uses their tongue to stimulate the anus of the receiving partner, focusing primarily on the exterior sphincter. Rimming is the perfect anal foreplay because the warm (and wet) sensations can help the body relax and bring you closer to your partner.

Your bum is a highly erogenous zone with a plethora of nerve endings. Because the pelvic floor is connected to the D or V, prostate (for those with one), and A, all of these contract in unison when you climax. Are you familiar with how it feels to have the nape of your neck or your lower stomach kissed? Well, when you have your bum “eaten” or rimmed (AKA anilingus), it’s like that multiplied by a thousand. External butt play may also be a good stepping stone to getting into full backdoor play, as it’s not as traumatic, but just as enjoyable (and sometimes even more if done right).

Is Rimming Safe?

The primary risks involved in rimming are your standard STD’s (like Hepatitis A, Herpes, HPV, Syphilis, Gonorrhea, Chlamydia, and others), as well as bacterial infections (e.coli, salmonella). Giardia, a microscopic parasite that is passed through feces, and other parasites can also be present. Here are a few tips to help keep things safe:

  • Practice good hygiene by cleaning the external bum region, as well as just inside your body (some people have extraordinarily long tongues!). This will help lower your incidence of infections.
  • Avoid rimming if you or your partner has been sick or experiencing symptoms of a possible stomach bug and, of course, if either of you has an active STD.
  • Afterward, be sure to shower and/or rinse off any part of your body that you are engaged with and use Listerine (only the real stuff) to help to lower certain STD transmissions.
  • Stay away from baby wipes because they may encourage irritation in these areas.
  • If your partner has a vagina, consider a quick rinse of your mouth before moving from rimming to vaginal oral sex to help limit any transference of bacteria that could cause a UTI.
  • Make sure you visit your primary doc routinely for full oral and bum evaluations. 
  • If you still don’t feel like the above precautions aren’t enough, remember there’s always a dental dam!

How to Prepare for Rimming

1. Talking to your partner

First: rimming isn’t for everyone. And that’s okay. It’s not always easy to have conversations about sex, but maintaining open lines of communication is key to making sure everyone feels safe, comfortable, and happy inside (and outside) the bedroom. If rimming is something that you’re interested in trying, I recommend exploring your booty on your own to get to know your body better (and to see if you even like anal stimulation). Once you’ve done this, I recommend talking to your partner before your next bedroom romp. That way, you avoid any awkward moments and potential pressure to do something while you’re mid-act. If your partner is the one who wants to try it, treat them with kindness – there’s no need for judgment – and give them an honest answer of whether it’s something you’re open to trying. I’ll be the first one to tell you – don’t know it until you’ve tried it. Sometimes, we have these preconceived notions about what we should and shouldn’t do in the bedroom and I think this mentality prevents a lot of people from experiencing the best sex of their lives. 

2. Cleaning

Next: hop in the shower. Everyone loves a squeaky-clean bum, especially if you’re going to be licking it like it’s an ice cream cone. A nice way to buff and smooth your hole is by using our Butt & Body Scrub. That should be plenty, but if you think things could go further (and deeper), you may want to first do a quick rinse with our Intimate Wash. I find it to be the perfect foreplay because it helps warm you up and relax your body before full penetration. Explore more on how to prepare for anal as a bottom

3. Landscaping 

 Finally, consider grooming. Everyone’s taste is different--some people prefer a natural bush, while others prefer a completely smooth hole. If you or your partner(s) desire the latter, you should consider laser hair removal. We prefer this method instead of regularly shaving, sugaring, using Nair, or waxing. The microtrauma those methods cause to your bum can actually initiate local dermatitis and HPV activity. This can lead to skin tags and other growths. 

Best Rimming Positions

The best rimming positions depend on what you like. You can be on your back, using a pillow to elevate your pelvic area

You can be on all fours, allowing the top to give from behind

Or on your stomach, which allows you to rest comfortably, while also freeing up your hands to help spread your cheeks for direct access to your hole.

And you can even sit on their face!

 

All of these positions will give the rimmer a direct shot at your anus.  Sometimes it’s nice to give your partner a helping hand by spreading your cheeks while they dive in. 

And don’t forget to pay attention to other areas—the taint is super sensitive (for guys), as are the inner thighs and hip flexors. It’s such a sensitive part of the body, so try licking it (like a lollipop), brushing delicately by it, blowing warm or cool air on it, or even making out with it—the sensations are breathtaking. 


    Ready to dive in?

    While some people may be turned off at the idea of putting their tongue down there, if you take the proper precautions, anilingus is worth exploring. Most people say the experience is like nothing else they can describe. Rim jobs can make your toes curl and your body shudder (in a good way, of course) and it’s also an act that can help bring you closer to your partner because what’s more intimate than this? Try it. You may love it. 

    About the author

    Dr. Evan Goldstein is the Co-Founder of Future Method and the Founder and CEO of Bespoke Surgical, the leading private practice in health and wellness for gay men. He received his MD from the University of Medicine and Dentistry School of Osteopathic Medicine. Dr. Goldstein is the go-to butt and bottoming expert, having been published in Huffington Post, Men’s Health, Healthline, and more. Learn about Dr. Goldstein by visiting his practice, bespokesurgical.com.

    The views expressed in this article intend to highlight alternative studies and induce conversation. They are the views of the author and do not necessarily represent the views of Future Method, and are for informational purposes only, even if and to the extent that this article features the advice of physicians and medical practitioners. This article is not, nor is it intended to be, a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment, and should never be relied upon for specific medical advice.

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