Did you know that today, September 25, the Bill of Rights turns 230 years old? The first 10 amendments to the United States Constitution laid out the essential principles that gave broad freedoms to American, such as the freedom of speech and the fifth amendment. Even though we’ve been debating these amendments for centuries on both sides of the political aisle, the Bill of Rights has unquestionably shaped the idea of what it means to live and be free in America.
As we at Future Method embark on a bold journey to improve the lives of bottoms and bottom-curious people everywhere, we thought it would be essential to draft our own sex-positive Bill of Rights for Bottoms, setting out what we, experienced bottoms each of us, believe our rights as receptive anal partners consist of, with explanations for each of our amendments.
You have the right to bottom however makes you feel happiest and the most turned on.
We believe that however you like to bottom, it’s okay by us. Maybe you like to take enormous dicks, one after the other. Maybe you prefer smaller sizes. Maybe you bottom every once in a while. Maybe you need it three times a day. Maybe you prefer toys to the real thing, and spend your evenings riding dildos and butt plugs. Maybe you prefer your fingers. Or your boyfriend’s fist. There is no wrong way to be the sexual being - or the bottom - that you are. You have our permission to be yourself.
You have the right to a thorough and affirmative sexual education and health care system.
If one is going to have sex and more specifically, bottom, it is your right to have access to doctors who don’t flinch during discussions of anal sexual health or other sexual practices. Moreover, one deserves to develop a long-standing relationship with a qualified queer doctor, proctologist and gastroenterologist to ensure that you have someone who is paying attention, and we mean solid attention, to your butthole and colon. Additionally, reliable sexual education that pays no heed to myths and misinformation is paramount.
Shame and pain have no place in bottoming. Unless you want it to.
Some people like the pain of a hard, pounding fuck or the intense feelings that occur during fisting. Some people like to be called names, demeaned, made to feel like a hole without a body attached. But these kinds of things are things you want to be talking to your partner about first. Not doing so could lead to an awkward moment where you and your partner are actually operating on different wavelengths. Once you’ve agreed on a vibe - and there must be agreement - you can proceed in building the scene that is about to unfold and engaging with your partner(s).
No one has the right to tell you that your way of engaging sexually is wrong, unless you are violating someone’s consent.
Straight society has tried to make us feel shame about our desires for centuries, and one of their most successful practices was reminding sympathetic ears that homos, had anal sex. You know, they put their dicks where the poop comes out! Never mind the fact that anal sex is just as popular with straights, or that douches work, we as gay men have no reason to behave like straight bigots and make fun of other gay men for being bottoms, whether insatiable, bossy, passive, or what have you. Sexual differences should be celebrated, not demeaned. There is no hierarchy of sexual behavior. Tops are not more masculine and bottoms are not lower or more feminine. Femme, butch, vers, sub, whatever type of bottom you are, you’re a winner, baby.
The bottom is in control of the situation and their word goes.
For anal sex to work, as mentioned above, partners have to be in agreement and develop a rhythm, as it’s a truly intimate act, even if the settings are anything but(t). The bottom decides when he is ready to fuck, how much he can take and for how long, the position that most gives him pleasure. Though tops may of course be consulted and asked for help if needed with fingers and toys to loosen holes up, and though the dominant role may appear on the surface to be the top, deep down, every bottom must knows that he is fully in control of his own destiny. The bottom reserves the right to change positions for comfortability or pleasure, and also end anal play at any time he desires.
The right to make mistakes is the essence of being a bottom.
The number of bottoms who had a 100% perfect experience during their first time is minimal. It takes some time getting used to the feelings, the pain, the intensity, the internalized shame that can emerge, and find one’s way to the pleasurable place that makes bottoming wonderful. Therefore, bottoms have the right to make mistakes, and no one should hinder their ability to learn from their mistakes. Real sex is different from porn movies, so if a leg cramps up, if a position becomes uncomfortable, if suddenly things get a little messy even though all precautions were taken, every bottom deserves to be forgiven for their mistakes and taken for another spin by their top(s), without a federal case being made about it, or gossip being bandied about.
Self-identifying as a bottom doesn’t mean that one can’t also top.
With profiles on apps forcing us to classify ourselves, sometimes we can get stuck in our roles. There’s no reason that you can’t just suddenly decide to switch things up - with conversation of course to make sure the intentions are clear and both parties agree. Sometimes when we wear the label of proud bottom, it can keep us locked into one avenue, one practice. Sexuality grows and develops, it takes detours. If one is open to the unexpected and game for surprises one may feel pride in expanding one’s horizons in wonderfully stimulating ways.
Gear and jockstraps sure are cute, but they’re not required for you to be a perfect bottom.
I hope by now you’re starting to get the message that there’s no one right way to be the perfect bottom. A lot of times those of us who travel in certain social sex positive circles are expected to rock a certain look for a certain party. But this stuff is just enhancement. It can be wonderful to induce self-confidence with a cute jockstrap or pair of briefs, but clothes don’t make the bottom. The bottom makes the bottom.
Free your mind. Your ass will follow.
It shouldn’t really need to be said, but we see on apps, time and time again, gay men stating their “preferences” as being emphatically NOT certain races, body types, mannerisms, positions, and ages. We also see the flip side, where gay men state that they prefer a certain race and speaking to and about them in fetishizing ways. Open up your mind to the possibility that every type of person has something to offer that is worth experiencing and engaging with sexually. We are here to prop each other up, not tear each other down.
You have the right to well-made products made specifically by professionals who understand bottoming.
We want you to have better anal sex and experience fewer awkward moments. We want you to be able to engage and feel free, pursuing your path as a bottom without fear. You deserve access to sexual health and play products made by gay professionals who think about gay sex and gay men’s bodily care when they design and manufacture a douche, dildo, plug, lube or anything else. Before you put something in your body, consider what you’re putting in your body. Don’t be embarrassed to demand more. Know your rights!
Tops will be patient. Every bottom has a different routine and time-frame.
If both can host, the bottom (who has to prepare) decides the meeting location.
No "tap-tap" before everything is inside.
Age difference is irrelevant.
Do what you feel!