The Joys of the P-spot

Dr. Evan Goldstein

fundamentals June 29, 2020

What is it and why should I explore it?

In popular culture, there appears to be an increasing acceptance of and curiosity toward butt play. Whether you call it bottoming, pegging, or simply butt stuff, those who have a prostate, otherwise known as the “P-spot” or male G-spot, and it’s worth exploring. If you already have—you know exactly why. Butt for the butt-curious, read on to find out more.

What is the P-spot and how do I find it?

The prostate is a small muscular gland that produces the seminal fluid in ejaculate and also helps propel semen when you climax. It’s walnut-shaped, located just below the bladder, and about 6-8 cm inside your rectum, towards your D (away from your tailbone). It’s present in people assigned male at birth and is surrounded by nerve endings. Thankfully, most toys, strap-ons, (and Ds) are already angled for direct access, so it shouldn’t be hard to find.

It’s important to experiment with different angles, heights, and positions of both you and your partner (or toy) to see how best to stimulate your P-spot. For beginners who don't want to jump straight to penetration, simply stimulating your perineum (via rubbing or stroking) is a great introduction to your p-spot. Because the P-spot is towards your stomach, you need to pay close attention to the curvature of your partner or your toy. However, there are prostate-specific toys that are great for beginners since they were designed to take the guesswork out of this type of stimulation. If either of these curves upward, then the best way to hit your P-spot is by facing each other. This means missionary and cowboy (and any variations of these) will be best. On the other hand, if your partner or toy curves downward, you’ll want to try positions where you aren’t facing each other, like reverse cowboy, doggy, and spooning. Of course, any position can feel great, but if you truly want to experience a P-spot climax, finding the right position will help maximize your pleasure.

How can I experience its benefits in the bedroom?

The prostate is a highly sought after area of pleasure because it is surrounded by nerve endings. When you climax while stimulating your P-spot, it will feel relatively similar to having an orgasm just from touching yourself, except that it is way more intense and can be felt throughout the entire body.

Whether you experience pleasure, pain, or unprecedented ecstasy comes down to your pelvic floor angulation, the angle of insertion, what size toy or penis you're inserting, etc. For some people, the sensations at first may feel like you have to use the bathroom (don’t worry—if you’ve prepared with the Future Method Intimate Wash, you won’t actually go). With time and experience, you’ll get used to this.

Will it be painful?

If done properly (read up on our 5 Bottoming for Beginners Tips first), meaning with ample dilation, copious amounts of lube, and a patient partner, you shouldn’t experience any pain. However, most people are not aware that the P-spot is very sensitive—in a good way and a bad way. If you pound it too hard or too repetitively, it can get irritated and cause prostatitis. If this happens, you may need a helping hand—literally. Use one or two well-manicured fingers (long nails are a no-no) to massage your prostate from the outside, in, on one side (and the same on the other side). This moves the fluid into the correct place (some call it ‘milking the prostate’), helping release it (and the pressure) when you come. Not only will this hopefully relieve your prostatitis, but it’ll also give you a mind-blowing climax.

Bottoms up!

If you’ve never felt a P-spot climax before, I think it’s time for you to try. The sensation is beyond anything you’ve ever felt before. Before you dive in with a partner, set aside some time for self-experimentation and exploration. There’s less pressure to perform when you’re alone and you’ll be able to find out what feels good (and what doesn’t). Why do you think so many bottoms crave the big D? It’s not only for the act of full penetration, but also P-spot stimulation.

About the author

Dr. Evan Goldstein is the Co-Founder of Future Method and also the Founder and CEO of Bespoke Surgical, the leading private practice specializing in an elite standard of health and wellness care for the modern gay male. He received his medical doctorate from the University of Medicine and Dentistry School of Osteopathic Medicine in 2002. As the preeminent expert and thought leader in the field, Dr. Goldstein is committed to education and awareness—not only bringing the important issues surrounding intimate health to the forefront, but also eliminating the stigmas attached to it and has become the go-to butt and bottoming expert in mainstream media, having been published in Huffington Post, Cosmopolitan, Shape, Healthline, and Men’s Health, among others. If you'd like to find out more about the medical aspects of a healthy sexual life, visit Dr. Goldstein's practice, bespokesurgical.com.

The views expressed in this article intend to highlight alternative studies and induce conversation. They are the views of the author and do not necessarily represent the views of Future Method, and are for informational purposes only, even if and to the extent that this article features the advice of physicians and medical practitioners. This article is not, nor is it intended to be, a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment, and should never be relied upon for specific medical advice.

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